What is Relationship OCD (ROCD)?

Relationship OCD (ROCD) is a subtype of Obsessive–Compulsive Disorder in which a person becomes excessively preoccupied with doubts about:

Their relationship : “Am I with the right person?”

Their partner’s traits : “What if their flaws mean we’re not compatible?”

ROCD is not a separate diagnosis, it is OCD with relationship-focused obsessions and compulsions.

The ROCD Loop (Simple Visual)

Intrusive Doubt → Anxiety → Checking/Reassurance → Temporary Relief → More Doubt.

This creates a cycle in which relief is short-lived and the doubts keep returning stronger.

How ROCD Shows Up

Obsessions (Intrusive thoughts)

• “Do I really love my partner?”
• “What if I’m making the wrong life choice?”
• “What if someone better is out there?”
• “What if this small flaw ruins our future?”

Compulsions (Mental or behavioral rituals)

• Checking and re-checking feelings toward the partner
• Asking for reassurance repeatedly
• Comparing the partner to others
• Googling for answers, forums, or quizzes
• Mentally replaying conversations for proof

Impact

• Exhaustion due to constant overthinking
• Fear of commitment and decision paralysis
• Emotional strain within the relationship

ROCD vs Normal Relationship Doubts

NORMAL DOUBTS:

Occasional • Trigger-based • Do not lead to rituals • Not disabling

ROCD:

Persistent • Intrusive • Leads to compulsions • Causes distress and impairment

How Clinicians Identify ROCD

Psychiatrist at Vibha Healing Centre, Dr Parth Yoganandi, explains that ROCD is identified not by the content of the doubt (whether the relationship is right or wrong), but by the process in which the doubt becomes obsessive, unwanted, repetitive, and paired with compulsions such as reassurance-seeking, checking emotions, or mental comparison. The key markers include:

• Intrusive doubts that feel uncontrollable
• Rituals to gain certainty or emotional validation
• Significant distress or impairment
• Ego-dystonic nature — “I don’t want these doubts, but I can’t stop them”
• Ruling out normal uncertainty, GAD, OCPD traits, or attachment insecurity

What Helps ROCD?

ERP (Exposure & Response Prevention)

• Facing fears while resisting the urge to check or reassure
• Learning to live with uncertainty rather than eliminate it

Cognitive Work

• Reducing perfectionistic and all-or-nothing relationship expectations
• Reframing rigid beliefs about love and compatibility

SSRIs

• May reduce the intensity and frequency of intrusive thoughts

Digital CBT Interventions

• ROCD-focused therapeutic apps demonstrate promising results

Treatment Snapshot

ERP Alone: ~50–70% improvement
ROCD-CBT Apps: ~30–45% improvement
CBT + SSRIs: Up to ~75% improvement

Research Highlights

• Doron et al. (2014) – Relationship OCD framework
• Doron et al. (2013) – Partner vs relationship-focused obsessions
• Mizrahi et al. (2017) – Nature of partner-focused ROCD
• Doron et al. (2019) – ROCD-specific mobile CBT trial
• Ajlouni et al. (2020) – CBT treatment outcomes in ROCD

Dr. Parth Yoganandi

Psychiatrist, VHC